Memories of Trevor

I think when a loved one dies we become afraid that we will "forget". Not the person but all of those yummy moments we had with them. My grandaughters Taylor and Dakota wrote letters to their little brother Trevor Andrew Huntsman that were read at his funeral this past week. Trevors' Grandma Mary Jo also wrote a letter that was read. I thought how very nice what a way to remember.

Hi Trevor,
     Your life has touched many many lives in such a special way. Your mom was due for you on March 30th, 2007. Which would have been your Uncle Andrew's 22nd birthday. He had died in an auto accident in 2003 at the age of 18. Your mommy and daddy decided to name you after him. Your Aunt Bethany and I had been watching the movie Pay It Forward when Andrew died. Only recently had I been able to rewatch that movie and guess what the little boys name in the movie is? Trevor! It just blew me away. The concept of the movie is to pay forward good deeds to three people without expecting anything in return. If everyone did that it would keep going forward to everyone in the world. What a way to lead our lives!
     Since you had the genetic disorder Myotonic Dystrophy you could not swallow the amniotic fluid very well and your mom went into labor for you very early. They were able to stop the labor. This enabled them to discover you would need special care when you were born. On that Sunday evening February 25th 2007, they delivered you by cesarean section and immediately put you on a ventilator since you could not breathe on your own. My first sight of you was with tubes and wires hooked up to you everywhere. But you opened your eyes and looked at me with what I can describe as "soulful". It was the look that said "help me Grandma Lisa". Your mom and dad had to make such hard decisions for your 3 years of life. The doctors prognosis was that you would probably never be able to do anything on your own and that you would probably not have much mental ability.  You showed them! When visiting you one time in the hospital the nurse asked me if I wanted to hold you! My heart lept with joy! It would be my first time. You were on a feeding tube so I can say it was my first time feeding you as well. I found out later that I was the first one to hold you other then mommy and daddy. How blessed I have been. (Of course you had your Chicago Bears onsies laid on you! Go Bears! I had to start the brain washing early! Aunt Penny had found it and bought it for you.)
     At the age of 5 months you were finally able to leave the hospital and come home to your family. While you were in Children's Hospital in Dayton OH you had your godparents Jackie and Bobby, who lived there, visiting and taking care of you when it was not possible for your mommy and daddy to be there. They loved and took great care of you. I rounded up a crew of people and supplies to redo your house in order for them to release you. Your whole house had to be redone. Bringing you home there had to be a seperate electrical circuit, your bedroom could not be upstairs like it was planned. Walls were erected, everything was painted and cleaned. Food was stocked in the freezer. Many people who never met you helped with these tasks.
     Your daddy kept me updated on your every accomplishment. The first time you were off the ventilator, which was your first breathe. Oh how we celebrated! You always were very bright and alert. Following sounds and lights. I am a mermaid and always take all the kids swimmimg so I kept whispering in your ear, "Trevor you have to get better so Grandma Lisa can take you swimming. " The excitement on that December day I was able to take you in the motel pool at Donahue Christmas 2008.
     Your first birthday was celebrated at Trinity Luthern church in Ft. Recovery when you, Taylor and Dakota were baptized. Your second birthday we celebrated at the skating rink in Winchester. They let us push you around in the umbrella stroller. You loved the lights and music and danced the night away! Your 3rd birthday I went to your moms house to give you your presents and you played with your remote control puppy and sunglasses. You did not want Grandma Lisa to leave. You never wanted anyone to leave without taking you with them. You were a guy on the move! You will forever be 3 in our hearts. How we celebrate your birthday next year I don't know right now. I have done the Polar Plunge to raise money for Special Olympics the past 2 years in Illinois in honor of your birthday! Burrr....but nothing like what your little body has endured.
     Your sisters loved you so much. Taylor is such an adult and learned all your care. She could suction your trach when it needed done. I remember last July 4th she was bagging you while your dad cleaned out your trach because your emergency bag was not supplied correctly. Dakota had dreams of marrying you. She is only 4 so the deepest love you can have for someone in her mind is marrying them.
     My last living memory I have of you is the weekend your little half brother Connor came home from the hospital which was 2 weeks before you died. Your mommy said you needed a haircut so your stepmommy Amber and cousin Michelle gave you a mohawk. It was so cute on you! I took several pictures of you with it and then blew bubbles on your tummy to hear your giggle. We discussed your little brother Connor and you patted his head and said "brother" "Connor". He will be so happy that you are his Big Brother. Your dad walked up and we said "dad" together. I asked you what your daddy name is and we said "Mark" together. What joy to hear that!
     You died at your dad's house on that early Sunday morning March 28th 2010. Your dad said you had been vomiting all day Saturday. All your stats were ok so he and your mommy did not think you needed to go to the hospital. You were not running a fever either. He said around 11 pm he checked on you before going to bed and your stat levels were all okay  and you were sleeping soundly with the pedialyte bag hooked up to you. He had kept you on the vent all day to help keep your energy level up. Around 2 am he heard the alarms go off and went in to check on you thinking you had just pulled out your trach like you had been doing lately. He said your body was stiff and cool to his touch. He ran in and told Amber to call 911 and he did CPR on you until the ambulance arrived. Your mommy and daddy had signed a Do Not Resuscitate (DNR) order on you when you were very little. Between sobs your daddy said when it came down to it that he could not do that he said he had to do everything he could to try and save your life.
     The viewing and funeral was a very hard thing for all those left here on earth. We know you are running, playing and laughing and just having fun right now but we miss you sooo much! Taylor did not want to leave you "alone" at the funeral home after the viewing. She just cried and cried when we were leaving. She loves you sooo much. As hard as it is for us adults to understand that your body is just a shell to house you in while you are alive. It is double hard for a 9 year old little girl to make sense of it.
     While we can no longer touch your body to gets hugs and sloppy wet kisses you are forever a part of our lives. Your spunk and joy of life gives us courage to keep going even when times are tough. If you can do what you did what excuse could we ever give? Life is good! Thanks for the memories little guy." Pay It Forward" we will indeed!
Love ya bunches,
Grandma Lisa